New Beginnings

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Man, I don’t even know where to start. It’s been 2 years since I posted. 2 years! What have I done in that time? Looking back it seems like so much and so little too. I returned to Gainesville from Japan after obtaining a job as the Volunteer Coordinator for the Florida Museum of Natural History. I bought a car. I bought a house (that decision still scares me). I’ve made friends. I’ve started dating (also scary). I’ve run 4 marathons, an ultra and completed a GoRuck challenge since being back. I’m volunteering as the Program Director for Girls on the Run. Listing all of that makes it seems like I’ve done a lot, but something in me still feels empty, like I haven’t gotten anywhere.

This is not a new feeling for me. I think I’ve always had that yearning to do more, be more. In my early college days I thought it might be filled with religion and I tried a lot of churches. While that is fulfilling for some people, and I believe in a higher power, I don’t believe that is what leaves me empty. I have this desire, no this need, to make an impact. To be bigger than myself. I can’t do justice in describing it, but there’s this dull aching in my chest that needs to be tended. I want to help people, I want to make people realize that they are awesome, I want to inspire people to push themselves and, more importantly, love themselves. What do I do with that? I don’t know. In my “about” section of the blog I ask people to follow me as I discover who I am and what I want to do with my life. That was 2 years ago and I’m no closer to finding the answers. How do people figure out their calling? How can I make a difference?

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Anna Boom
    Jul 11, 2013 @ 05:27:06

    Where to start, is tough. Listing a few of the cool things you’ve done is a good way and all the other daily smaller events deserve attention too (posting for fb world the things you like about yourself and asking everyone to do the same, wearing a bikini, starting the monthly challenge, being Brave!). Journey, not the destination , right?

    Reply

  2. Katie Hieggelke
    Jul 11, 2013 @ 05:30:14

    scary shit indeed. I think you just have to follow your passion, you know what it is and you would be fantastic at it. xxxx

    Reply

  3. Sarah@ThereSheGoes
    Jul 11, 2013 @ 06:04:33

    I think you’re the coolest chick I’ve ever met Amy and if you were a lesbian…and if I were a lesbian… well, you know where I’m going with this – I’d definitely ask you for advice on Berkinstocks and Golden Retrievers!! I have felt the same thing for so long – that emptiness. While Shane was deployed and we were in Japan – I tried my hand at religion to fill the void as well and it didn’t work. What has worked – going with my gut and not being afraid to just jump in and TRY to make a difference. Starting WOOP is a good example of that. WOOP was the first time I took an idea and actually made it happen. Until then I just paid a lot of lip service to making things happen in my life. That sparked something in me that hasn’t died down since. I just keep trying to listen to my gut and go forward no matter how scary things seem. I just trust that if I mess up I’ll at least learn something while trying to actually accomplish something in this life. I can only hope, in the end, to have positively impacted the people around me in the process.

    Reply

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